ARM SORENESS:
This pain comes from either the original biopsy or the lumpectomy, but comes back here and there (still) as a strange tenderness that starts at the elbow and radiates all the way down to my hand. It's a lovely pain that I have figured out dissipates some if I inhale three gallons of water.
DRY MOUTH:
Not even sure what is causing this. It's not a listed side effect of either chemos I'm doing, so either it's the steroids or it's the anti nausea meds. How do I describe this one? At night, my tongue will become stuck to the roof of my mouth and probably resembles the texture of a cat's tongue. Oh and it feels like I licked a sandbox. Even after 4 -5 glasses of water, it's a chalky horridness that won't go away (other than using the lovely mints given to me by a friend. Thank you!). This particular side effect was the worst during the last round and nothing has sounded good to eat for days. But of course, I haven't lost a single pound. What a waste of a lack of appetite.
HEARTBURN:
Well you all know how that went...not great. This again, must be a side effect of medication as I didn't see it on the list of chemo side effects. The first round brought me to the hospital since I had this radiating chest pain where I thought the creature from Alien was about to burst forth from my chest at any moment. The second round welcomed the evil fire creature from Moana, Te Ka. Fire and lava reaching out from the pit of my stomach all the way up to my throat, leaving what felt like a welt every time I tried to swallow. We finally figured out how to keep that at bay, but coffee tastes like ass and it's always there, waiting in the wings for it's encore.
NAUSEA:
I'm happy to announce that, thus far, I have NOT thrown up, but I have had nausea. I wasn't the best at administering the anti nausea meds (but I think another side effect played into that). Anyway, it began with a nausea reminiscent to when I was pregnant. This constant gross feeling that I felt would almost be improved if I did throw up. During the first round I came close and they continuously adjusted my medications to combat these feelings. I still feel some level of it and thinking about any part of my hospital visits or certain foods will bring it about immediately. Even now. Luckily it starts to fade as I get closer to the next visit. Is that luck...or irony?
CONSTIPATION:
This is kind of like saying Voldemort in my house...for the Harry Potter fans.
NEUROPATHY:
I didn't even realize that this was what I was feeling until after the third round. The second round, almost when I was about to get the third, it came on like I was developing calluses on my feet. At one point I kept feeling like I had stepped on something that stuck to my foot. Like a bit of dirt or food and I tried to brush it off and nothing was there. It drove me crazy for about 10 minutes. So that is when I began to wonder if that feeling was neuropathy. That "numbness" which isn't really numbness and "tingling" that didn't really tingle. For me it was a callusy feeling on my feet, and on my fingers it felt like a tightening of the skin around the nails. Well now I know. It never lasts for more than a day (Knock on Wood). I do hear it's worse with Taxol though and I'm about to start that next week. I'm so over this shit.
HAIR LOSS:
But of course. There were a few out there that tried to give me hope and state that they knew those that had no hair loss with the chemotherapy. That was not the case for me and the doctors didn't really give me the idea that it would be the case. Once my hair began to fall out I decided to cut it (as I shared earlier) I buzzed it as short as possible without shaving (skin is also very sensitive) and within a week or two the rest of my hair fell out completely into my hats and during my showers. It made me wonder if I shouldn't have just waited for it to fall out without cutting it at all, as the tiny pointy hairs that fell out were super itchy. From the front I have a wonderfully shaped head. It works. From the back, I have fat man's head. It doesn't work. Hats it is.
INSOMNIA:
This one wasn't necessarily a bad thing until the third round where it was days of not sleeping. (Yes, this is an exaggeration. I slept for about 2-4 hours per day for about 3 to 4 days) The lack of sleep made me completely emotional as well. My poor fiance didn't get much sleep either, as I was up and down constantly getting frustrated with myself. I already was beginning to cry at the cheesiest of commercials, but now everything made me cry. As if I had the liquid to spare.
EXHAUSTION:
The last round had me so tired I believe it rivaled a case of mono, but I have no real basis of comparison. (Bright side, I was sleeping loads this time) I just have never experienced anything like it. And I truly hope that the radiation induced exhaustion isn't this bad. I would get up in an attempt to do the dishes or exercise like the doc...(ha ha ha ha I can't even finish this sentence). I would get up in an attempt to do the dishes or get a glass of water and I would get so tired. As I stood up my heart would begin to pound in my chest. It wouldn't be long before I had to sit or lay down again. The idea of climbing the stairs was borderline nightmarish. This feeling lasted for days.
There were many other side effects that I experienced here and there, such as swelling feet and nose bleeds, but those listed above were the heavy hitters for me. I'm so glad that this stage of the treatment is over and I hope it makes a huge difference in my recovery going forward. I guess eventually I'm going to need to do that exercise thing in order to aid that recovery, but for now, I'm just glad I'm mentally holding it together. And now I need more water, that thing that will not actually hydrate my tongue/mouth ever.
Note: Please see the bottom for some updates on the blog that allows you to check boxes on whether you found a post funny, informative, cool, etc.
Note: Please see the bottom for some updates on the blog that allows you to check boxes on whether you found a post funny, informative, cool, etc.
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